Resilience
What is resilience?
According to the American Psychological Association (2012), RESILIENCE is defined “as the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or significant sources of stress—such as family and relationship problems, serious health problems, or workplace and financial stressors. As much as resilience involves bouncing back from these difficult experiences, it can also involve profound personal growth.” (https://www.apa.org/topics/resilience)
Parents’ Role
in Strengthening Self-Resilience
As cited in the book, Child Psychology and Psychiatry: Frameworks for Practice 2nd Edition, Professor Barbara Maughan PHD, Professor of Developmental Epidemiology at the Social, Genetic and Developmental Psychiatry Centre, Institute of Psychiatry of King’s College London, stated that, “Families are biologically and culturally evolved to promote children’s development. Family relationships and parenting show ongoing links with the development of children’s behavioral control, and with the regulation of their attention, arousal and emotional systems throughout childhood. In addition, parents contribute to children’s cognitive development; socialize them into culturally appropriate patterns of behavior; promote their understanding of moral values and the development of their talents; and select and secure their access to key resources beyond the family system.” (Kuse, et al, 2011)
Here, Maughan has emphasized the significance of family relationships and parenting. Indeed, parents play a very critical role in child’s development. Parents need to help strengthen a child’s way of coping up with these problems and stressors. Parents also need to teach and show children on how to bounce back from these tough experiences.
Even at a young age, we need to teach and show them how to be resilient. Here are some simple ways on how to strengthen a kid's resilience.
4 Ways on How to Strengthen Kids' Resilience
- Confidence - Help build the kids' confidence.
- Communication – Help kids
communicate their feelings and thoughts.
- Connection - Help kids build strong relationships.
- Self- Care - Help kids find ways to relax and take care of self.
· Confidence - Help build the kids' confidence.
Confidence grows in a home that has affection, acceptance and appreciation.
Even if their interests, preference or opinions may differ from us, we need to show respect and acceptance. When kids feel they are accepted, their confidence also grows bigger.
For a task accomplished or for homework finished, let’s acknowledge and appreciate our kids’ effort. Reward does not need to be in material form. By saying phrases like: “Wow! You did it!” or “Good job!” can be quite rewarding for kids and can boost their confidence.
“I am good!”
“I am beautiful!”
“I am healthy!”
“I can do it!”
Communication – Help kids communicate their feelings and thoughts.
Always remember, communication is very important in building resilience. Helping our kids communicate their feelings and thoughts to us will also help build a bridge between us.
Aside from teaching them to communicate “positive feelings,” we also need to teach them to communicate “negative feelings.” Whether they feel happy or upset, accomplished or frustrated, they know that we are there to listen.
An
open communication will also help them process their own thoughts and feelings
and at the same time this will help them manage these emotions.
Connection - Help kids build strong relationships.
No man is an island. As the saying goes, relationships are
very important in life. Our kids cannot live alone. They need others to survive.
Also, our kids will understand more of themselves through relationships. In relationships, our kids will learn trust, develop their communication and social skills, and enhance their emotional expression.
We need to help our kids build strong and responsive relationships with others like their cousins, friends, playmates, teachers, etc. By doing so, we are also helping them build a strong emotional network and when time comes and they experience some problems in life, they will receive more emotional support.
Kids also need to be taught on how to properly take care of themselves both physically and mentally. When our kids lose in a game or when they fail in a school test, we need to let them know that they can do something to make themselves better.
When I look at trees, it really amazes me to see them stand the blizzard and the storm. They are tall, strong and flexible. Remember, these trees began as seeds.
Our children are like seeds. We need to let them get lots of sunshine and guidance, water them with attention and affection, fertilize them with discipline, and nourish them with lots love!!
When the rain and storm come, that they may face, they will stand tall, strong and resilient like the trees!
Here are some wonderful additional references about positive affirmation and self-care just CLICK this!
These are wonderful tips for empowering our children. Kids definitely need to know about self love!
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear this. Children who are more empowered will have more edge in life.
DeleteI love your tips how to build resilience to kids. For my son, we help him communicate his feelings. If he wishes to say something, we let him do the talking while we listen.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing. My eldest is 13 now and I remember doing the same thing for him when he was young and I let him communicate his emotions. Now, he is still open with his feelings with us, whether positive or negative. He is also helping his little brother aged 8 to express himself, too 😊
ReplyDelete